Democrat Rises from Dead

It was widely reported that the formerly exsanguine Bill Clinton will appear at a rally in support of the Kerry campaign on Monday. This represents a significant shift in presidential election dynamics. Whereas the Republicans have been running God's self-appointed commander on Earth, the Democrats can now at least boast a Lazarus-like campaigner on their side. If this reversal in the trend of divine intervention continues, do not be surprised, before the big day, to hear reports of apparitions beckoning the faithful to vote Democratic.

But enough joking for now. Please do the patriotic thing and assist our president in this time of international strife and calamity.